Confessions Of A Stay At Home Mommy

I confess that the above picture is something I used to completely strive to be- but it is not me. Most likely won't ever be me. And I am so over it anyways...

I confess that although I won't give up breastfeeding because of it I am so sick of hourly wakings and our move has only made it worse. Still chugging sleeplessly away.

I confess I get so annoyed after only being awake for an hour with the kids and Trace has already thrown 5 tantrums and won't listen to anything I say.

I confess I tune him out when he whines or repeats himself to save my sanity.

I confess I am waiting for my over night trip to the casino with my husband once Phoenix can sleep at her grandparents. (Husband doesn't know about this but I have plans in the works haha)

I confess I could give a crap that Trace wants to wear girl clothes, do girl things, and realize that it won't always be that way as he grows up. I hate when people fight so hard to push the gender specific junk. The kid spends 24/7 with a girly girl mommy and now a girly girl sister. Can you blame the guy?

I confess I wish Phoenix would learn to crawl already, get movin girl mama's arms are sooo tired!

I confess that through all the sleepless night, colic, stress and frustration my ovaries might not be done. But they probably are... And whichever way I stray is no one's business but mine and my husbands. The backhanded comments from strangers and family alike really get on my nerves. Think before you speak.

I confess that living in a somewhat "farm like" setting is making me want to start doing things I have never even considered before. Like becoming more self sustainable (on multiple levels).

I confess I am ready for fall and rolling in leaves with the kids.

I confess I feel like my brain has completely dulled down since being a stay at home mom and I crave knowledge so badly. I never want to stop learning new things.

I confess I wish my husband and I weren't so stuck in the everyday grind of things and spent more time loving each other. It is so easy to get sucked into a routine of ease and forget the reasons why you have your beautiful children. We need to work on being a couple more and that has taken a backseat since our son was born. Completely.

I confess that I finally gave in and got myself on some anxiety medication to ease the things that annoy me. When I am on something I am able to separate myself from situations and really see what is happening. That most of the time it is a situation that is not nearly as huge as my frazzled self is making it.

I confess I wish I had more time (and energy) to meditate. Not only is it calming and relieving, it brings me great joy and I feel so open to the world once I complete a session.

I confess I wouldn't change a single thing about my life.

Come on mommies, let me hear yours too!


Pega Pallo said...

I too, had to break down and get on anxiety medicine, which resulted in my having to stop breastfeeding. Hang in there mama, we all deal with the daily annoyances, you're doing great!

Mommyof3 said...

I confess that I am MORE than ready for school to start. I miss my kids like crazy when they are in school, but I love the baby time and the alone time I get during her nap time!

emily grace said...

thanks for being real!

Anonymous said...

I love the "I'm over it anyway!"

That is so perfectly said. It's inspiring because sometimes we all need to quit making ourselves be what other people want us to become, and say, "fluff it! It's not me, but I'm not going to let it hang over my life like a cloud. I am better in my own way." <3

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